anyways if you can somehow see this (you followed me and my old-ass db doesn't have my followbacks, fave this and i'll readd)

was able to rebuild my instance after a catastrophic fuckup, but my database is from august 2018 (ugh).

mccain humor 

oh hey i just realized that i can say this without the lens of irony because this aint twitter:

remember that lobbyists and politicians periodically have to go outside and exist in publicly accessible locations, and remember that you have fists.

remembering john mccain by engaging in a "controlled flight into terrain"

big tiddy waluigi
β€―Β­Β­Β­:waluigi:
Β­Β­ ​​:boob:​:boob:

can qe take a moment to appreciate how painters pioneered hornt on main?

I love being a funeral director and hiding in all my conservative customer's caskets so I can rock back and forth and moan loudly during their funeral service to both terrify their loved ones to their core and give them a sense of false hope.

food 

me taking all my electronic devices out of the airport security bin after being scanned

Watching a show on veterinarians & segment comes on where they're operating on a seal.
Me: "Don't they know that you should never operate on a seal?"
Brother: :thaenkin: "He's got cuts & broken ribs. Why shouldn't they operate on him?"
Me: "Do not open if seal is broken."

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Mastodon

a small self-hosted instance running on physical hardware. We will always *very aggressively* ban any right-wing content. Generally chill. This is run on a machine use for some other stuff that is way overprovisioned for the tasks i need it for; uptime should be near 100% and i take hourly backups of the db and user content. If people start using this (more than like 20), i'll set up some HA/failover mechanisms to guarantee it stays up. For now it should be a lot more stable than the more heavily populated instances. I don't plan on ever explicitly prohibiting content (besides nazi shit, which will be fucking purged and doxxed instantly), but if people are reporting troubling content I'll play it by ear. If you have compelling arguments for making a more strict content policy, you can be on the mod team! DM me.